Colossians 3:18,19; Ephesians 5:22-33
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, that he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
ADAM CLARKE (1760-1832): No woman has the duty of a wife to perform but she who is one, and no man has the duty of a husband to perform but he who is married.
A. W. PINK (1886-1952): That may be a very trite remark, yet today it needs making.
MARTYN LLOYD-JONES (1899-1981): Today, the whole thing has become aggravated, because of the modern notions of equality between men and women, the results of the so-called “feminist” movement—which claims that men and women are equal in every respect…Taking it in general, and as a principle, it flies against the plain teaching of the Scripture at this point, and is without any question, the cause of much confusion, much trouble, and much damage to the marriage state—and alas! it seems even to be seeping into the thinking of many who call themselves evangelical, and who claim to believe in the Scripture as the inspired Word of God.
H. A. IRONSIDE (1876-1951): The rejection of the inspiration of the Bible places the law of God, as written in the Ten Commandments, among the productions of the human mind. Therefore its code of morals is spurned and a lower ethical system, more in keeping with present day conditions, is substituted. And so, loose standards prevail where Scripture no longer speaks with authority. “They have rejected the word of the Lord, and what wisdom is in them?” Jeremiah 8:9. Unholy ways always accompany, and indeed spring from, unholy teachings…Men and women sustaining unholy relations are rocked to sleep in their sins while death, judgment, and eternal punishment are fast approaching!
JOHN CALVIN (1509-1564): And certainly, where the bond of marriage is broken—the whole of human society sinks into decay.
A. W. PINK: Marriage is designed as a preventive of immorality: “To avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband,” 1 Corinthians 7:2.
H. A. IRONSIDE: He made them at the beginning, male and female—This is the divine institution of marriage…These verses picture sanctified wedded love.
ARTHUR TAPPAN PIERSON (1837-1911): The Divine institution of marriage teaches that the ideal state of both man and woman is not in separation but in union, that each is meant and fitted for the other; and that God’s ideal is such union, based on a pure and holy love, enduring for life, exclusive of all rivalry or other partnership, and incapable of alienation or unfaithfulness because it is a union in the Lord—a holy wedlock of soul and spirit in mutual sympathy and affection.
MARTYN LLOYD-JONES: What the apostle is concerned about here, is one big point only—harmony, and peace, and unity, as it is displayed in the married relationship. So, that being his leading theme, he picks out on the two sides, the element that needs to be emphasized above every other. The thing the wife has to keep her eye on in maintaining the harmony, is this element of submission. The thing the husband has to keep his eye on, is this element of love.
JOHN DAVENANT (1572-1641): It is to be observed that He requires the duty of the wife in the first place.
JOHN TRAPP (1601-1699): Submit is a short word, but of large extent. It comprehends reverence; “Let the wife see that she reverence her husband,” as Sarah did, and is chronicled for it, Peter 3:6, “Even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord.” God is pleased to single out this, and set it as a precious diamond in a gold ring to Sarah’s eternal commendation.
CHARLES BRIDGES (1794-1869): Whether the woman lusts for rule, or repines under the obligation to submit, either principle breaks the rank in which God has placed her.
H. A. IRONSIDE: “Silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts,” 2 Timothy 3:6. How remarkably this is fulfilled in modern Feminism! Observe the words “led away with divers lusts,” which might be freely rendered “ambitious desires.” This desire for publicity, this deplorable masculinity, this denial of man’s headship, this usurping of authority, is one of the most striking signs of the times…But also to the attitude and position taken by so many “silly women” in the churches. How sad it is to see the plain command of God: “Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak,” 1 Corinthians 14:34—now so generally disregarded. Today there are not a few who unblushingly denounce the inspired apostle as “an old bachelor with narrow ideas.”
JOHN BUNYAN (1628-1688): When women keep their places, and men manage their worshipping of God as they should, we shall have better days for the church of God in the world.
CHARLES SIMEON (1759-1836): Husbands—Your duty is to “love your wives,” and never on any occasion to entertain an unkind feeling towards them. A proud, haughty, imperious carriage towards them is most offensive to God, who will regard every harsh, bitter, or contemptuous expression towards them as an abuse of your authority and a violation of His commands. Though He has constituted you lords, He has not authorized you to be tyrants; but requires you to be precisely such lords over your wives, as Christ is over His Church. You are to govern, it is true; but you are to govern only for the good of the wife: you are to seek only, and at all times, her best interests, and to promote to the utmost of your power her real happiness. You must not require any thing unreasonable at her hands, nor ever fail to recompense with testimonies of your love, the efforts which she makes to please you.
WILLIAM JAY (1769-1853): If the wife is to be governed by you, you are to be governed by reason and religion. You are to “give honour unto the wife,” 1 Peter 3:7. What honour? The honour of attention. Nothing is so intolerable to a female as neglect; and upon what principle can a man justify indifference, omissions of observance, and heedless manners towards a wife?
CHARLES SIMEON: Nor must you merely endeavour to render her happy, but you must be ready to make great sacrifices for this end. What the Lord Jesus Christ has done for His Church, is set forth as the proper model and pattern of your duty towards your wife: “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the Church, and gave Himself for it.” O! what an example is here! Methinks, no wife would complain of the obedience that is required of her, if the authority of her husband were exercised in such a way as this: on the contrary, obedience on her part would be her chief delight. Know then, ye husbands, that this is the duty assigned to you: if your wives are to be obedient, as the Church is to Christ, ye also on your part are to be loving, even as Christ is to the Church. Your wives should be to you as your own flesh.
MARTYN LLOYD-JONES: It is only as we realize the truth about the relationship of Christ to the Church, that we can really function as Christian husbands are to function.
J. C. RYLE (1816-1900): Husbands and wives are continually doing either good or harm to each other’s souls. Let all who are married, or think of being married, ponder these things well.
